Wow!

well, today I went shopping for new clothing. YEAH!!! I was so excited. I managed to finally button the size 16 pants - snuggly but finally got them buttoned. SSOOOOOO, I decided not to purchase them yet but to hold out a bit more longer - I also got to try on some bathing suits (YUK) I finally noticed my thighs starting to trim down but also noticed a lot of cellulite "pockets" and loose fitting skin, that is when I realized it's time to crank up the incline on the treadmill while doing my cardio time - also need to work the abs more. It is working and I have begun to see it, but now I need to step it up at the gym and start toning more. Today on the scale I hit 193 (my lowest yet) it was such a good feeling. Afterall, I've been down on my self lately the weight went up 4 lbs so I had to lose that again and start. I did a 2 day cleanse with my self with yogurt, milk , cream soup, and lots of water. After I did that my hunger pains started to fade and they are longer again between meals. When I go see Dr. H next Wednesday I am going to ask for a small fill I sense that I am close to where I need to be, but not sure exactly how much more I need. I guess I will have to converse with him and let him know whats going on so we can decide the size of fill that is up coming. Back to the mirror while trying on my clothes I guess I just thought going to the gym was all I needed to do and I'd have no pockets of skin - I was wrong they are starting on the legs - that is kinda bothersome, it would be noticable with shorts and a bathing suit! Good thing it is only March and I have time to work my legs to the bone. Well I guess I got to vent again, that's why I did the blog to vent to myself. Off to bed.

Almost There

Well, it's been a while and lots has been going on. I think I am almost adjusted as to where I need to be. Maybe a few more smaller ones will do the trick. But my body could be tricking me - I just experienced my first "cycle" since October. So my body is way out of whack. I managed to get down to 194 then my cycle came and I went right back to 196-197. I don't know!!!!! I go see Dr. H next week and hopefully he can shed some light on this for me. My goal is be be 190 by the end of Feb. I don't think I am going to make it that's like 6 pounds in a matter of a week. Oh, well there is always next month. I am still aiming at 5 or 6 lbs a month. Soon I will be there - just need to get through my adjustments....

How much have I lost?

That seems to be the most popular question. I hear it all the time. Well to answer a few of the most popular questions. How much have I lost? Since March 2008 I am down 53 lbs, since surgery in I am down 27lbs. I have had 2 fills so far. And yes I am still hungry between meals. It sucks big time - but it is a work in progress, I knew from the beginning that it wasn't going to happen just like that! I knew it was going to take some time to find my sweet spot. So yes I get angry that the weight is coming off quickly - but I don't want it to either. I want my body to have the chance to rebound without all the floppy and loose hanging skin pouches. That is why I hired my personal trainer, that is why I'm losing about 1 lb a week, that is why I get upset. Eventually, I'd like to get to the point where I can drop 1.5 - 2 lbs a week. That is still in the "healthy" range. I keep telling myself the slower the better. But I'm dragging my feet here! I have lost a lot, I have got my blood pressure and sugar back down out of the danger zone (it was creeping up into the diagnosis stage). I am down in to size 18 - the 16's go one but won't button. My shirts for the most part are now larges. I went to the store Sunday to buy a new pair of pants for the gym I took and XL off the rack and headed out, got home tried them on and they were too big, I took them back Monday and traded them in for a Large - not only did the size go down BUT I saved $13 they were marked to clearance overnight. So I am headed in the right direction I'm just taking my time. Off to the gym now - will post again after my 3rd fill Friday.

Happy February

Well January has come and gone and I missed my goal by 3 lousy pounds. Oh well, I'm feeling good, I have noticed a bit of thinning finally. Pant size hasn't changed! Yesterday I had a get together and two of my dear friends spent the day with me. They are both occasionally on the strange side - but that's okay that's why I enjoy their company and friendship. We all need weird once and a while - heck I'm weird all the time! So it is only natural. They both kept telling me that I look good and have lost lots of inches, and one kept saying "your looking good, I can't believe how good you look, and I'm sorry I just keep staring at you". It made me feel good. In support group everyone is saying how friends sometimes turn jealous and a freindship is ruined, but that's not the case here - these two special friends are keepers. I love them both like sisters. Now, so it is written down and official my goal for this month is to lose 5 lbs. I have all of my support (Verizon wilreless calls it their network) to keep me honest - and eat better meals. I need to thank Tori for all her hard work in kicking my butt weekly at the gym. I need to thank my family and friends for keeping me on my toes and being a wonderful support system. I need to thank Kenny for sticking beside me and helping me through all of this, and my wonderful daughter for being her and reminding me to slow down my eating and asking the "dumb" questions to make me stop and think about all of this and what it means. February is here, a new month a new goal, hopefully some better weather, and some better health for my sister who's been sick since December - she's doing better now, but I still worry about her. One positive thing that I've gained from the surgery is I'm no longer an emotional eater, I am an emtional eater in remission. It's getting easier, heck I've kicked the soda habit! I can just about do anything now.